Ducking Ugly

“yesterday was too much for you, am I wrong?..No, that’s  alright.It’s a beautiful one.But..but (sighs)those mountains..What about them? They are these eye sores, they’re ducking ugly..

(repeats)’ducking ugly’…Hahahaha! you guys are ungrateful species! just count your blessings,mate.And be happy that you got the waterfall and stones right!..Yeah sure. (rolls eyes).

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Mother of Invention

“..you mean Curiosity..??”

“No! I meant CurioKity-thats the name of the new cat.”

“aaaaand she wanted to be aaaaannn..”

“an Astronaut,yeah.”

“Waaaooo that’s Bullcrap even for you! you know that ,right?”

“amm..(shifts uncomfortably)”

“Okay, sooo again, who did you say was the Mother of Invention..? CurioKity??”

“No sir, her name is Mrs Boredom- she’s the actual mother.”

************ends here******************

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Human Alarm

“…Alarm for getting up every morning on time, reminder alarms for birthdays and anniversaries,even alarms for baking.My personal favorite(and yet to be invented) is the Human alarm (still working on the name)!They compare time for you.The past you and the present you. They (insert choice of onomatopoeia) and tell you about the pit falls,the mistakes you might play on repeat.Human Alarm warns, hugs and doesn’t  judges you..it’s your new electro-mechanical friend..”

(Available in: mother-like,dream-lover, that-gay-fren,best-buddies faces)img_9134